Last week was very hectic, bringing new beginnings
. Another thing I want to start doing is being more motivated in regards to feeling healthier. I don’t like to be negative, or just rambling on about something many of you may not think is worth reading, but I wanted to share an honest ordinary moment from me, about me this week.
When I gave birth to our second baby I knew instantly that my muscles seemed different. The midwife examined me to have a 5cm split. Probably from having children born 18-19 months apart, big babies, fast labours and all of that on my slim frame body. I carried all three of them the same – watermelon football shape out from, no weight anywhere else really. Phoenix was my biggest at 8lb14. With a small age gap again (almost 20months) it battered my already weak tummy muscles. I now had a 7-8 cm case of diastasis recti
and my belly button also popped out all three times throughout the pregnancies and I’ve accepted that it isn’t ever going to be the same again along with a suspected umbilical hernia.
A small price to pay for my three beautiful heartless children i know but it’s one I have to live, try to fix and cope with. Coping in a way that it does cause discomfort, back ache, tummy weakness, no core strength at all and lack of confidence. self esteem/ confidence has always been a weak point for me so this just added to that pressure for me personally. Motivation can be a hard thing for me as if I don’t see immediate improvement, I get disheartened and just leave it. This isn’t cutting it anymore, regardless of how tired I feel most evenings, I need to keep at it. I need to schedule proper dedicated time for myself, invest good efforts in making myself stronger in more ways than one, particularly my tummy and self esteem. I want o have more energy, feel more radiant as opposed to lethargic and weak. I know that ‘clean eating’ goes along side this and its something I want to include. I’m not that bad to be honest, my downfall is that I don’t eat enough of the more nutritional foods, instead i’ll just find myself so busy and stupidly forget and settle for whatever the kids have left, or just get a pain au chocolat! (This is more the case for lunch time) hydrating myself with water more is another factor to this!
I have done a post natal rescue dvd before by Erin O’Brien, which is fab, I can do this from home which helps, it’s just when to find the time once the littles are in bed. So i’m going to make more time to do this during the day, even if it means including the littles – they’ll probably love it more than me! I’ve been looking at purchasing the MuTu system programme
, i just need to feel more motivated first before buying more dvds! I’ve been wanting to go to a class outside of my home too which will give me more focus time, but it’s just the whole not feeling like i’ll be able to keep up with a class due to the ‘no core strength’ situation. Or wanting to start running again since my teens but its just confidence. Confidence can be such a rubbish aspect of life sometimes as it can really over power you in such a negative way and just wastes time spent really. It’s funny as other than the occasional natural feelings when you question yourself as a parent, its there that I feel most confident. Being a Mama. When it comes to being Natalie – not so much.
Anyone else relate?
I’m really not brave enough to post any before/starting picture just yet. it’s something not relevant as its the feeling healthy part I want to master. it’s taken me a while, but the marks gained from pregnancy and birth I am really proud of. I’m completely amazed at how I managed to achieve them, yes I have days when i’m annoyed at how clothes fit, or that I cant feel comfortable in that stylish crochet cropped top I saw in River Island and but hey its not the end of the world and there’s always something else to wear and feel comfortable in.
This isn’t a post about losing weight, I just want to feel better about myself, feel fitter & remember that I matter too along with being a Mama to my three important people. This is an ordinary moment for me, not the most uplifting I know – but it’s an honest little note from me, and i’d love to hear from anyone else thats over coming post-pregnancy tummy split (diastasis recti) or has even overcome it.
As I settle in to our new home, albeit being very busy still, I want to make sure i’m making time for myself. I am hoping to post my journey so keep a look out for future posts on my ‘feel healthy goal’ if you like.
Linking up with the lovely Katie at Mummy Daddy Me.