A cherished moment – First school nativities
A few months a go I was absolutely dreading the reality that our biggest girl would be taking the huge step in her childhood and starting primary school in foundation stage. If you’re a regular reader here, you’ll have seen that I was back and fourth with what the better option would be when it came to either formal education or home education/ unschooling. And as much as I have my doubts each day, more so about how much I miss her but also about the way it does change them in a way (more on this soon) I really do think she enjoys herself. Not only this, she has really overcome little things such as confidence in big crowds. There was a time that she hated doing things like sports day as she thought that people clapping was a bad thing, or that her first P.E session, she refused to join in as it was just something she didn’t feel comfortable with and needed to do it at her own pace, with her own mind.
This is a positive thing I do think about since her starting at the lovely little village school as confidence is such an important thing when it comes to life. Even from a young age, and I feel that when they feel at ease with themselves, this is such a lovely thing to watch. So the time came for the Christmas festivities to start, a few weeks ago, she rushed out of class with a huge smile on her face to tell me that she was one of the starring ‘angles’ in the church nativity. And as much faith I have in her, I was still holding that protective Mama feeling inside wondering if my little girl would be okay up there in front of lots of people having to sing and say her lines (confidence hasn’t been a strong point of mind while growing up so it’s something i’m finally trying to change for good as I don’t want it to impact my littles and seeing her walk in so confidently made me realise what a strong little person she is, not that I ever doubted her ability for one minute. I think it’s that initial ‘oh my goodness, my first born, my baby is up there, doing something so new to me!)
She got all in position, and the nativity began. My heart was pounding with pride, I was fighting back the tears of joy and just in sheer shock at how amazing she did. shock just because that was our little girl stood up there doing her thing, singing her big heart out and looking like she really was enjoying every second. This was most definitely a moment I will never ever forget, I did get a little filming but not much. I purely wanted to embrace that short moment, cherish it and capture it through my eyes, and store it into my heart.
Not only this big change with our biggest girl, we had another change with our littlest girl that she would be upping her hours at nursery to every morning. I was reluctant as this meant six 25 minute car journey’s back & fourth to the school in total and I did worry if it was a bit much, but as it is such a motherly and playful setting – she loves it so much and I wouldn’t second guess it now even though the driving to and from is strenuous at times. So along with the festivities starting, little Halle had her nursery Christmas singing the other week as well and to say she was in her element was an understatement. This little girl is at that age, or maybe its just her nature where she loves to perform. before the actual performance we had so many shows and renditions of all the songs she’s been learning, telling us how she’s going to stand, what she wanted to wear and that she was going to sing ‘so loud’. Once we got into the church, she couldn’t wait for the show to begin, she got all snug next to her friends, but made sure she could see me in the crowd in front to show off all her practicing. I did film a little clip with her too, but again, felt like I didn’t want to watch through my camera, I wanted to soak in that moment of our little girl in her element. The amount of pride I felt rushed right through me and she just made me feel all happy inside. More than anything, it was adorable to see how happy she was being up there, and wondered why it was over so soon. We made up for it though with our little walk to the village fete and then to meet Daddy & Phoenix for a pub roast.
All these little memories that I didn’t realise were going to come around so soon can be so bittersweet, I want time to slow down, But while I don’t have the actual control over that I will embrace and preserve these moments well & truly.
Moments like these are to be cherished, forever.